Jam adaptuar q\u00eb gjat\u00eb fjalimit me njer\u00ebzit, qoft\u00eb si hatib (i xhumas\u00eb), ligj\u00ebrues, si fol\u00ebs n\u00eb klas\u00eb shkollore, apo n\u00eb mes t\u00eb nj\u00eb grupi t\u00eb njer\u00ebzve, t\u2019i p\u00ebrhapi pik\u00ebpamjet e mia me shpejt\u00ebsi dhe pand\u00ebrprer\u00eb, derisa nj\u00ebri prej tyre m\u00eb pati m\u00eb krahasoi me flladit\u00ebsen shkaku i rrotullimeve t\u00eb shumta t\u00eb saj.<\/p>\n
Nuk di, s\u2019e kam menduar n\u00eb vete kjo a \u00ebsht\u00eb nga cil\u00ebsit\u00eb e mira q\u00eb i posedoj apo \u00ebsht\u00eb cil\u00ebsi e keqe.<\/p>\n
Me siguri q\u00eb k\u00ebto cil\u00ebsi i kan\u00eb an\u00ebt e tyre pozitive; nj\u00eb prej tyre \u00ebsht\u00eb se e t\u00ebrheq shikimin e atij q\u00eb e ke p\u00ebrpara teje, e rr\u00ebmben v\u00ebmendjen e atyre q\u00eb jan\u00eb t\u00eb pranish\u00ebm dhe e sheh p\u00ebrmas\u00ebn e komunikimit t\u00eb tyre me ty. Mir\u00ebpo, megjithat\u00eb, e zbulova q\u00eb i kan\u00eb edhe an\u00ebt e tyre negative.<\/p>\n
Isha n\u00eb klas\u00eb duke folur para nx\u00ebn\u00ebsve t\u00eb mi. \u00cbsht\u00eb e natyrshme t\u00eb mos di shum\u00eb prej jet\u00ebs private dhe holl\u00ebsirave q\u00eb nd\u00ebrlidhen me jet\u00ebn e tyre. Nd\u00ebrkoh\u00eb, hyra n\u00eb tem\u00ebn e lidhjeve t\u00eb ndaluara q\u00eb e veprojn\u00eb disa t\u00eb rinj me t\u00eb reja dhe e trajtova gjer\u00eb e gjat\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb pik\u00eb. Si zakonisht ua paraqita pik\u00ebpamjet e mia derisa e p\u00ebrfundova fjalimin dhe m\u00eb pas dola.<\/p>\n
Pas disa dit\u00ebsh, m\u00eb lajm\u00ebroi nj\u00ebri prej nx\u00ebn\u00ebsve t\u00eb asaj klase, me t\u00eb cilin kisha lidhje miq\u00ebsie, se shoku i tij i klas\u00ebs i kishte th\u00ebn\u00eb: \u201cM\u00ebsuesi Muhamed fjalimin q\u00eb e mbajti p\u00ebr lidhjet e ndaluara e kishte p\u00ebr mua, sepse t\u00ebr\u00eb koh\u00ebn po m\u00eb shikonte mua.\u201d<\/p>\n
Nx\u00ebn\u00ebsi m\u00eb tregoi p\u00ebr gabimet q\u00eb kishte r\u00ebn\u00eb n\u00eb to shoku i tij, i cili mendonte q\u00eb e synova at\u00eb n\u00eb fjalimin tim. Un\u00eb, n\u00eb t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb, as q\u00eb e dija se ai vepron gj\u00ebra t\u00eb tilla, bile as q\u00eb e kisha pritur prej tij t\u00eb binte n\u00eb gabime t\u00eb tilla.<\/p>\n
Nuk m\u00eb kujtohej q\u00eb gjat\u00eb fjalimit shikimin a e kisha t\u00eb fokusuar drejt tij apo jo.<\/p>\n
Prej problemeve q\u00eb lindin n\u00eb k\u00ebso situate \u00ebsht\u00eb keqkuptimi i shikimit. Meqen\u00ebse e shohim se kush po reagon me fjalimin ton\u00eb, kjo nuk n\u00ebnkupton se motivi i reagimit t\u00eb tij vjen nga p\u00ebrkujdesja apo mahnitja, por, ndoshta, vjen nga shqet\u00ebsimi apo di\u00e7ka tjet\u00ebr q\u00eb neve nuk na shkon n\u00eb mendje.<\/p>\n
Me sa duket p\u00ebrgjat\u00eb fjalimit tim ka pasur nj\u00eb lloj komunikimi me sy n\u00eb mes meje dhe nx\u00ebn\u00ebsit, por sqarimi i tij negativ p\u00ebr pik\u00ebpamjen time m\u00eb shtyu q\u00eb pastaj t\u00eb jem m\u00eb i kujdessh\u00ebm gjat\u00eb trajtimit t\u00eb temave e, ve\u00e7mas, kur tema \u00ebsht\u00eb e ndjeshme, apo flas p\u00ebr gabime dhe veprime q\u00eb nd\u00ebrlidhen me sjellje t\u00eb caktuar. E kuptova q\u00eb gjat\u00eb fjalimit duhet t\u2019i largohem shikimit t\u00eb personave apo t\u00eb ndonj\u00eb ane t\u00eb caktuar, sepse, nganj\u00ebher\u00eb, mund t\u00eb vij\u00eb deri te keqkuptimi. At\u00eb q\u00eb e shikoj mendon se po e synoj pik\u00ebrisht at\u00eb me fjalimin tim, apo t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt e mendojn\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb.<\/p>\n
Kur jemi duke folur rreth ndikimit t\u00eb shikimit, nj\u00eb her\u00eb, teksa isha n\u00eb Meke duke ligj\u00ebruar para nj\u00eb grupi njer\u00ebzish dhe, at\u00ebkoh\u00eb, para se t\u00eb dilte brezi i telefonave t\u00eb men\u00e7ur, e p\u00ebrdorja telefonin q\u00eb i ngjasonte deri diku celularit t\u00eb sotit. Ishte i modelit m\u00eb t\u00eb ri q\u00eb ma mund\u00ebsonte t\u2019i ruaja shkrimet dhe t\u2019i shkruaja ato, si dhe e p\u00ebrdorja p\u00ebr t\u2019i p\u00ebrmbledhur pikat kryesore q\u00eb do t\u00eb flisja rreth tyre n\u00eb ligj\u00ebrat\u00eb. Nd\u00ebrsa, at\u00eb koh\u00eb, n\u00eb p\u00ebrgjith\u00ebsi, telefonat q\u00eb gjendeshin n\u00eb treg ishin nga ata m\u00eb t\u00eb thjeshtit. Nj\u00ebri prej t\u00eb pranishm\u00ebve ishte ulur para meje m\u00eb p\u00ebrcillte me v\u00ebmendje dhe me precizitet.<\/p>\n
S\u2019ka dyshim q\u00eb secili fol\u00ebs d\u00ebshiron ta shoh\u00eb se kush po bashk\u00ebvepron me fjalimin e tij dhe kush po ndikohet nga fjal\u00ebt e tij. Natyra e njeriut \u00ebsht\u00eb e till\u00eb. Mua m\u00eb mashtroi kujdesi i tij dhe m\u00eb shtyri ta shikoja her\u00eb pas here. P\u00ebr mua ishte nj\u00eb lloj i p\u00ebr\u00e7imit t\u00eb mesazhit pozitiv p\u00ebr veten, kurse atij p\u00ebr t\u2019ia t\u00ebrhequr m\u00eb tep\u00ebr v\u00ebmendjen.<\/p>\n
Pas p\u00ebrfundimit t\u00eb ligj\u00ebrat\u00ebs, u ula t\u00eb pija kafe me organizator\u00ebt e takimit. Pasi dola prej xhamis\u00eb, e takova at\u00eb t\u00eb riun i cili q\u00ebndronte para meje n\u00eb ligj\u00ebrat\u00eb. M\u00eb pritte t\u00eb m\u00eb takonte, a mua ky fakt m\u00eb bindi edhe m\u00eb shum\u00eb q\u00eb ishte ndikuar nga fjalimi im, duke e marr\u00eb parasysh se ai po m\u00eb priste, e tash ose d\u00ebshironte t\u00eb m\u00eb fal\u00ebnderonte ose t\u00eb m\u00eb pyeste di\u00e7ka.<\/p>\n
Pasi m\u00eb p\u00ebrsh\u00ebndeti, m\u00eb lajm\u00ebroi se merret me mjete komunikimi dhe me aparate teknike, e telefoni im ia kishte t\u00ebrhequr v\u00ebmendjen dhe m\u00eb pyeti: \u201c\u00c7far\u00eb lloji \u00ebsht\u00eb?\u201d<\/p>\n
Kur e kuptova se v\u00ebmendjen ia kishte t\u00ebrhequr telefoni e jo tematika e ligj\u00ebrat\u00ebs dhe se reagimet e tij kishin qen\u00eb p\u00ebr shkak t\u00eb telefonit e jo p\u00ebr shkak t\u00eb ligj\u00ebrat\u00ebs, qesha n\u00eb brend\u00ebsin\u00eb time, por nuk i tregova p\u00ebr mendimet t\u00eb cilat m\u00eb her\u00ebt m\u2019u soll\u00ebn n\u00ebp\u00ebr mendje.<\/p>\n
– Prej rastit me nx\u00ebn\u00ebsit e mi m\u00ebsova t\u00eb kujdesesha m\u00eb tep\u00ebr p\u00ebr gjuh\u00ebn e syve dhe llojet e shikimeve, t\u00eb jem preciz se kur t\u00eb shikoj drejt atij q\u00eb e kam para meje dhe kur ta largoj shikimin. Pas k\u00ebtij rasti, m\u00ebsova shum\u00eb se sa thell\u00eb ndikon shikimi tek t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt, p\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb shkak fillova t\u00eb jem m\u00eb i kujdessh\u00ebm se si ta shp\u00ebrndaj shikimin tim kah t\u00eb pranishmit.<\/p>\n
K\u00ebtu p\u00ebrshihet edhe t\u00eb folurit n\u00eb form\u00eb aludimi q\u00eb i p\u00ebrngjason qart\u00ebsimit; disa ligj\u00ebrues i mb\u00ebshteten t\u00eb folurit n\u00eb form\u00ebn aludive me nx\u00ebn\u00ebsit e tyre, me an\u00ebtar\u00ebt e familjes s\u00eb tyre apo me nj\u00ebrin prej tyre, mir\u00ebpo ky aludim nuk p\u00ebrmban n\u00eb vete ndonj\u00eb tjet\u00ebr shpjegim (andaj kuptohet direkt).<\/p>\n
Situata nganj\u00ebher\u00eb k\u00ebrkon qart\u00ebsim, prandaj, kur i p\u00ebrshtatet rastit, duhet t\u00eb flasim qart\u00eb. Nganj\u00ebher\u00eb situata k\u00ebrkon aludim, prandaj duhet t\u00eb flasim me aludim n\u00eb form\u00eb t\u00eb p\u00ebrshtatshme. Ndoshta situata k\u00ebrkon heshtje, sepse ai i cili q\u00ebndron para nesh, ka mund\u00ebsi ta ket\u00eb kuptuar gabimin e tij dhe t\u00eb jet\u00eb vet\u00ebdijesuar p\u00ebr veprimin e tij.<\/p>\n
Mir\u00ebpo, mashtrimi i njer\u00ebzve me t\u00eb folurit n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb aluzioni t\u00eb pap\u00ebrshtatsh\u00ebm, ndoshta ndikon m\u00eb keq se q\u00eb ndikon t\u00eb folurit e qart\u00eb t\u00eb cilin e kuptoi personi n\u00eb fjal\u00eb.<\/p>\n
Dr. Muhamed Duvejsh<\/p>\n
Nga arabishtja: Irfan Jahiu<\/p>\n
Pjes\u00eb nga libri: \u201cGabimet m\u00eb m\u00ebsuan\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Jam adaptuar q\u00eb gjat\u00eb fjalimit me njer\u00ebzit, qoft\u00eb si hatib (i xhumas\u00eb), ligj\u00ebrues, si fol\u00ebs n\u00eb klas\u00eb shkollore, apo n\u00eb mes t\u00eb nj\u00eb grupi t\u00eb njer\u00ebzve, t\u2019i p\u00ebrhapi pik\u00ebpamjet e mia me shpejt\u00ebsi dhe pand\u00ebrprer\u00eb, derisa nj\u00ebri prej tyre m\u00eb pati m\u00eb krahasoi me flladit\u00ebsen shkaku i rrotullimeve t\u00eb shumta t\u00eb saj. Nuk di, s\u2019e […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":5897,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5,6,67,23],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-5896","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-c95-ahlak","8":"category-c96-davet","9":"category-te-zgjedhura","10":"category-c89-urtesi"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/shkollaislame.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5896","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/shkollaislame.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/shkollaislame.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/shkollaislame.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/shkollaislame.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=5896"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/shkollaislame.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5896\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5898,"href":"https:\/\/shkollaislame.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5896\/revisions\/5898"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/shkollaislame.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/5897"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/shkollaislame.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=5896"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/shkollaislame.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=5896"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/shkollaislame.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=5896"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}